10 Things to do Before Choosing a Boarding School for a Troubled Teen

Released on = August 6, 2006, 6:57 am

Press Release Author = Russ Bundy

Industry = Consumer Services

Press Release Summary = Unique website offers 10 suggestions for those who are
considering placing their child in a troubled teen boarding school.

Press Release Body = 1) Ask about their success rates. A quality program should
have a systematic way of measuring success and should be able to provide information
to interested parents about that success. If a school is reluctant about telling
you their success rates or can only provide anecdotal evidence of program
effectiveness, this is a fairly good indicator that the results aren't too
impressive. If you are quoted a statistic, be sure you understand what the number
means. Some schools define success in very loose terms. Often "success" actually
means "lack of failure," or simply that a graduate hasn't been arrested since
leaving the program.

2) Talk with some parents with a teen in the program. Talking with a parent who
has had direct experience with a program will ensure that you don't get swindled by
a fast-talking salesperson. If a school is confident about the service they are
delivering to their current clients, they should be happy to allow you to speak with
them. If they make excuses or claim that they want to protect the anonymity of
their clients, you can rest assured they are bluffing. If a program works, it will
have plenty of support from parents who have had a good experience with it.

3) Take a tour of the program(s) you are considering. This will give you an
opportunity to assess the adequacy of the facilities, the professionalism and
competency of the staff, and most importantly, the contrast between new students and
soon-to-be graduates. When viewing the facilities, remember that you don't want a
hotel (your child needs a reason to want to come home) but you don't want rundown
buildings either. Something that is basic yet clean and tolerable is a good
balance. Try to get a sense of the program's philosophy of change when talking with
the staff and also watch to see how the staff members interact with the students.
The soon-to-be graduates can provide a good example of what the program is capable
of helping their students create. To take a tour of several troubled teen treatment
facilities across the United States visit http://www.troubledteenprograms.org

4) Don't base your decision on either pure emotion or logic. Avoid the tendency to
overreact to an emotional situation. If your teen's behavior represents a
consistent problem, now may be the time to act. However, make that determination
when you have returned to a stable state of mind. On the other hand, choosing a
program for a teen requires more than simply weighing the pros and cons. Choose a
program that makes sense that you can also feel good about.

5) Don't tell yourself that ignoring the problem will make it go away. Although
some problems may go away on their own with time, serious behavioral and emotional
problems in adolescents may appear dormant for a time, but will always resurface if
allowed to continue unresolved. If the voice inside you is telling you it's time to
stop pretending that your child doesn't have a problem, you should probably listen.

6) If it isn't working, stop doing it! If it has become clear that your attempts
to control your child's behavior are not working, it's time to stop and reevaluate
the situation. We've all heard it before, but doing the same thing and expecting
different results is the definition of insanity. Stop banging your head against a
wall and get help.

7) Understand that you don't always get what you pay for. Although typically true
for most consumer products, price does not always reflect quality in the troubled
teen help industry. Make sure you understand what you are paying for. Many high
quality programs are in the range of $3,000-$4,000/month. Paying thousands more per
month isn't necessarily going to change your child's behavior any better or faster.
You may be making someone else rich however and paying for services that fuel your
teen's sense of entitlement. On the other hand, if you've found a program that
claims to offer services similar to more expensive facilities for under
$2,500/month, it's probably too good to be true.

8) Look for a program that involves the whole family. A family is a system. When
one part of a system has a problem, it affects other parts in the system. In fact,
most problems within a system involve the interaction of two or more parts. The
family is no different. It is vital that parents and even siblings where possible
get involved in the change process. If your child comes home to a broken system,
the changes they have made, however significant, will probably be short-lived. Be
willing to accept that you may be part of the problem and be willing to make the
changes you need to in your own life. A successful program should offer services
that allow family members to work on individual issues as well as relationship
problems. This might be accomplished through parenting courses, family therapy,
seminars, etc.

9) Don't tell your child you are going to put them in a program-unless of course
you enjoy inviting unnecessary drama into your life. If you have made a decision to
place your child in a treatment program, or even if you are only considering doing
so, it's best to keep it to yourself. Very few teens will be in favor of such a
decision, so breaking the news early just makes your life miserable since you now
have created a situation where your teen feels it is necessary to manipulate you
into changing your mind. Your teen should not be part of the decision making
process since he or she is already demonstrating the inability to make responsible
choices. Discussing this decision with your teen may also encourage your child to
run away or "live it up" like the end of the world has been announced.

10) Remember that just because you have a troubled teen doesn't mean that you are a
bad parent. Children don't come with a manual and each is unique in the challenges
they bring to parenting. Yes, you probably made some mistakes along the way, but
dwelling on your guilt for the way your child is behaving is senseless and will not
help solve the problem. Shift your focus to what you can learn in order to bring
your child back, and never stop loving them. Your love and commitment to your child
is ultimately the key to helping them reverse their self-destructive lifestyle.

Russ Bundy has a Masters Degree in Social Work and has been working with troubled
teens for several years. He currently operates a website that assists parents in
finding information needed to make a sound treatment decision for their children.
For more information visit http://www.troubledteenprograms.org or call 1 (800)
429-5090 to get free information about troubled teen programs.



Web Site = http://www.troubledteenprograms.org

Contact Details = Russ Bundy
Teen Revitalization
http://www.troubledteenprograms.org
1 (800) 429-5090
info@troubledteenprograms.org

  • Printer Friendly Format
  • Back to previous page...
  • Back to home page...
  • Submit your press releases...
  •